Alright...so I wish I could tell you how long this will be but I never really know. I just let everything on my mind flow.
Zombies are...well I guess it'd be safe to say, an obsession of mine. They are one of the most interesting things I have ever "experienced" in my life. The sheer fright I get from a zombie when I think of it just chills me to the bone! A zombie is a walking corpse...a dead person that moves as if it were alive. The best part? All it wants to do is eat any living person! Like a robot, a zombie is driven by only THAT. I think the thing that attracts me the most about zombies is how REAL they are. To think that something that terrifying can seriously happen in our world just blows my mind.
Here is my rant on zombies, what the media has done to them, and the people that think they really know what they'd do in a zombie apocalypse.
First things first, I hate when people tell me the "best" zombie killing weapon. They just don't think things through. People decide that the most epic weapon is the best. WE'RE NOT IN A FREAKING VIDEO GAME! Alright skeptics, maybe the ZA (zombie apocalypse) will never happen, but if you're going to ask someone what they'd use in it, be realistic. The answers I hate most? Chainsaw and shotgun! Here is why. The chainsaw for starts is just ludicrous! Have you ever seen anyone cutting a tree before? They position themselves, line up the cut, and drive it home. You're telling me that you are going to just angrily swing that heavy, deadly machine towards a walking corpse...AND destroy it's brain...you must be on crack to think that! oh, and should I include that there is more than likely at least 20 others after you finish that one? Yeah, you probably won't get tired at all doing that. Next is the shotgun. Alright, first ask yourself...do I have a shotgun? If the answer is "no"...then SHUT UP! You aren't going to go freaking buy one in the middle of the apocalypse. Break open that piggy bank to get the 12-gauge! Then lets say you do have one...alright, how much ammo? Enough to take down 100 humans with head shots? Plus that shot gun is USUALLY a scatter shot which is USELESS in a ZA since you need to kill the brain. All this will do is cause the same amount of zombies coming at you, just now they have (more) meat hanging from them. If you get the single bullet...why not use a rifle? More distance on that one and much more accurate.
The point is, think people! Use your brain!
The next thing is the confusion in media. This is what usually causes people to say "i'd do this in a ZA" or "I'd totally use that in a ZA". This is more than likely part of the reason people want to use lawnmowers, chainsaws, fire, explosives, and baseball bats as weapons against the undead. I would like to quickly jump to fire. Fire is used with movie zombies regularly. It all started with the father of zombies himself, George Romero. Fire was an incredibly important part in his first zombie movie "Night of the Living Dead". This classic horror film was AMAZING! Please, don't think I am going against Romero in any way! He has created some pretty amazing films. My problem though is he did not create the ZOMBIE. He created the MOVIE ZOMBIE. Move zombies NEED to be more epic. They need weaknesses (fire in this case). The movie showed zombies not only being afraid of fire, but having fire as a useful weapon. Fist off, how the hell do zombies have fear? THEY ARE DEAD!!! Next, fire would not be very useful. Since zombies are dead, they do not have any pain...so instead of having a crippling corpse due to the ridiculous pain of burning flesh, you have a walking dead thing coming to eat you...AND IT'S ON FIRE! Well this could lead to houses being burned down...maybe the one you are trying to hold up in. It would take quite some time for the brain to melt/boil.
Next problem with the media is the use of blood. It's a horror movie...WE NEED MORE GUTS!!! Oh, i soooo agree. I love love love the gore of horror flicks. But zombies do NOT have blood squirting from their decimated appendages. Think about it...the heart is not pumping since it is dead...how the hell can blood be squirting? If there is still blood caught in their veins, it would spray from impact and that's all! So many people are worried about blood spray on zombies and refuse to go into in close melee combat. This will more than likely not happen. Do not be afraid to smash a zombie in the head with a crowbar because you may get a red shower. This doesn't mean to go charging in when you can kill from a range, but you gotta do what you gotta do. Don't let the movies fool you!
Also, zombies don't learn. I would explain this more but...it's getting repetitive. THEY ARE DEAD!!!! That's pretty much the answer to most of these arguments. Everything about them is dead other than the fact that they can move.
I must admit that a lot of my information has come from "the zombie survival guide" but this is because mostly all of it is accurate. I have read that book at least 3 times and have highlighted important information. I have also done my own research on the topic and found my OWN list of zombie killing weapons. My wish list, and my do-able list.
Here is my list of equipment!
Crowbar
Wooden Baseball Bat
Sturdy Kitchen Knife
Rope
Machete
If you care to have me explain any just leave it in a message.
Want me to evaluate your plan, equipment, supplies, etc? Just let me know in a comment! Any zombie question? I will answer here!
So since we're going along the real life theme here, does the Survival Guide go into any detail about how they actually function internally as zombies? I'm actually kind of confused here, so maybe you can clear it up.
ReplyDeleteI know there's tons of ways to die -- scratch that -- there's various functions your body ceases to perform that classify you as being "dead." A lot of times now (thanks to medical advancements), death is defined as "brain death," when electrical activity of the brain ceases to exist.
If your whole goal is to rock the brain when encountering a zombie, doesn't that suggest their brain is still active, therefore, they're alive? I mean if their brain is still transmitting some sort of electrical impulses, there's a good chance they can feel some sort of pain. Also, if it's still transmitting, your cerebrum is what makes you capable of moving (among other things). Therefore, if they're capable of movement, their brain isn't "dead," right?
I mean, the whole part about organs not pumping and shit like that makes sense. It's possible for everything in your body to be fine and, for instance, be in need of a specific organ transplant. Your brain is still sending messages to the heart saying "pump," but the heart just can't pump because it's a bad heart, right? So, true, if their hearts aren't beating, blood isn't circulating, rocking the shit out of them isn't going to give you a red bath, as you stated. But the part about being "dead" and still needing to destroy the brain is what's confusing to me.
I was always under the impression zombies are created from some sort of virus. Is that correct? If so, is it just the effects of the virus that target the brain and alter their internal state to be "completely dead minus movement and instinct to consume flesh?"
In all seriousness, just trying to clear it up.
yes yes, i understand what you are saying. I'm going along the lines of being "alive" as like...well...a real human being haha. Looking at Frankenstein, Dr. F declared his beast to "be alive" because it moved and could make sounds. I guess we need to look at what living is...so yes, your question is very valid. If you are calling "alive" being brain activity, then yes, zombies then are alive. It's weird to think about it that way. I feel that's a very poor definition of what is living and if scientists are truly calling that "living"...they are on crack. Zombies only have brain impulses to make the muscles work. Pain is not caused to them because those nerves are no longer functioning. Think of zombies as your computer in safe mode.
ReplyDeleteYou are correct! Zombies are created from the virus known as solanum. It attacks the brain, kills it, and basically re-programs it turning into a feeding robot so to speak. So if you want to call that "alive" be my guest haha.
I hope that clears things up a bit.